I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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