do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Randomize
