You're a womanizer and a bitch.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Randomize