Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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