let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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