Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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