i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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