Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
