so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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