Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
It was like getting head from an anaconda
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
