My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
