This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
