i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
