Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
