Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
