I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize