let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
