I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize