end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize