omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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