Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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