just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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