question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
