I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Sorry about my life...
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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