Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize