Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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