last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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