I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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