I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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