I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
This toilet bowl is my home.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
