Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
