Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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