Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
