I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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