I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
