omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
