the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Randomize
