It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
