so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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