No stitches, just platelets and will power
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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