All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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