my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
NoShamevember. You game?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
