Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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