I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
