how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize