from now on my penis is your penis
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
