i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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