I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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