ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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