he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
