apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize